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Warriors and the wives who wait

Waiting Warriors group eases fears and tears of wartime

Sarah Granados Deal, the wife of a Davis-Monthan airman twice deployed in the Middle East war zone during their two-year marriage, knows first-hand how a wife can feel when her husband is gone.

“Each day I’m surprised that I get my clothes on and brush my teeth,” she wrote earlier this year to a fellow military wife.

Then she discovered Waiting Warriors, a support group for military spouses before, during, and after deployment that meets every other Tuesday at the Tucson Air Force base chapel.

Waiting Warriors was founded at Davis-Monthan Air Force Base by three Air Force wives. What began as casual support meetings has grown to an outreach organization that includes a school-age children’s program – ‘What About Me?’ 

“I don’t feel alone anymore,” says Granados Deal who, like her husband, is 23. “I have a big Mexican family in Tucson and they’re very supportive, but it’s hard for them to understand this from a military perspective. I wasn’t doing very well, and I knew I had to take care of myself. When I’m there, whatever I say, I’m not being judged. I leave there in peace.”

What sets Waiting Warriors apart from other military base support groups is its inclusiveness, says current leader Vicki Luethy, a wife of an airman, mother of five, and a working nurse.

“What attracts so many women to Waiting Warriors is that we go by first names only and we don’t discuss rank,” she said, asking her husband’s name and rank not be used for this article.

“Other support groups are usually for wives of officers or wives of enlisted men. Here, you never know who you’re sitting next to – it really makes people comfortable and at ease.”

This is no knitting circle – nor is it a Bible study, even though it meets in the base chapel. The Waiting Warriors offers emotional, and sometimes financial, support.

“For the spouses left behind, it’s really very stressful. You may suddenly find yourself a single parent with everything landing on your shoulders. That’s why this group is so important, we’re all going through the same thing,” Luethy says. “When we’re helping them and teaching them, it helps them help other people.”

There are tears and fears shared at the Waiting Warriors, but the group incorporates fun times in their bi-weekly get-togethers. There’s also games and laughter. A recent “Pity Party” had the women write their troubles on a balloon, talk about it and then pop it.

Though the current group consists solely of women, there have been male spouses of deployed warriors in the group.

“And we’ve had returning airmen come to the meetings with their wives. We talk with them about their feelings and emotions, how they felt about being away. They’re really honest,” Luethy says. “This really is an amazing support group.”

Waiting Warriors may soon become an international organization. One of the founders moved to Germany to be near her husband.

“I can honestly say, I’m eternally grateful for what Waiting Warriors has done for me, and that it’s there for others who need help,” says Granados Deal.

For more information, contact WaitingWarriors@Yahoo.com.